Yahoo!

I found this little gem on the Yahoo Singapore webpage. I think it's really interesting. Has anyone else noticed it? Or is it just me? This gives all of us a view as to what Singaporeans using Yahoo are looking for:

Popular Searches: S. League, NDP 2004, Jay Chou, Asian Cup 2004, "Who Lives Near You", Taegukgi  

(as of 3.10pm Singapore Time, 29 July 2004, Thursday)

So it's basically soccer, entertainment and this Friendster-like website. Heh. Kind of interesting really.

Really should pay attention

Man. I really should pay attention to the news. PAP is telling us that we have it good; every generation does that doesn't it? Yah, my maternal great grandfather came here on a boat, but my maternal grandfather went to school in a horse-drawn carriage. Siong meh? I go to school by bus. Yah, last time my paternal grandfather walk to school, but he lived next door. When I was in Secondary School I had to sit on MRT/SBS for 1 1/2 hours before getting home. Sure last time both my grandfathers didn't go to University, but they both got 'O' Levels, which meant they could be government clerks. My dad also only 'O' Levels but last time can find job in any MNC. Now I have BA also hard to find job. So who has it good? Last time got no AIDS and cancer not as prevalent, but got TB and no good medicine. But now also got incurable diseases and TB still around, plus now got SARS. So like that draw lah.

I think Minister Khaw and the older generation better stop telling us how good it is for us. We live in different times which call for different answers. Like that our ancestors had it worst than us. Live in caves and eat raw meat, no lights, no bus, no government. Siong lah. F#$king Bulls^&t. Nothing else better to talk about issit?

Lost roots and lost souls. Heh. Another push for bi-culturalists. So my roots where? Singapore. My soul? Catholic Church. So like that how? Help humanity or help my country? Sometimes my country to do things contrary to helping humanity? Minister Khaw, like that how?

I just had to say

Ok. So I came across this on the Straits Times (usually I ignore the BS stuff from there), and I think some kids are overachievers and others, like me, are underachievers. I mean I wanted to do a BA/MA thing, but then I thought why go through all the stress. Enjoy myself in the US and make contacts. Oh well, some folks are meant to be Singaporean Scholar-Mandarins and others, like me, are meant to be Global Nomads.

Round and Round

Ok some news from Malaysia. One about Malaysian Idol and one about Michael Moore. The Malaysian Idols are really quite good, I don't know about the Singapore Idols. But if the teaser is anything to go by, I think Singapore Idol might be good too. I'm no Idol fan (my girlfriend has to bribe me with the S word before I'll sit down and watch), but I think Singapore Idol can be fun. Someone keep me posted on the going ons please? I'll be away. The Michael Moore one was interesting, a good piece, I think. I still think the guy is an a&*hole. But everyone is entitled to say what they like, whether it's true or not.

In other news, China now has "Taiwan 2020" plan. Yup. It's official, China's going to take Taiwan back by 2020 latest. I'm sure they'll be more successful than our Goal 2010. Listen Taiwan, no one in East or Southeast Asia wants a cross-straits war, so why don't you take one for the team and go back to China. Afterall you're not even a nation. You can't speak at the UN or WHO, I mean you're only an observer. I mean even the Vatican is a recognised nation. Seriously, your childish acts were what got China riled up, so now they have this 2020 plan, so don't go running to anyone and saying how mean the Chinese are. You asked for it. I mean China can definitely  do it. If they can shut down 700 porn sites (sorry all you cheekopeks out there) in less than a month, they can take over Taiwan in 16 years.

Well that's it for today. See you all soon.

Number 2

Yup. So the Old Man of Oxley pointed out that Lao Goh will be Number Two in the cabinet. A friend of mine asked if Old Man was number 1 and Old Goh was number 2 and Dragon Prince was number 3. But Old Man said that Dragon Prince will be boss when he become PM. Old Man also said something to the extent that he'd stop being involved in Singapore only if you pry it from his cold, dead hands. As for titles...

PM LHL, SM GCT and Grand High Poobah LKY. Or maybe Official Advisor to the PM. Or Senior than Senior Minister. Or Super Lao Jiao Minister. Or Supreme Being.

Now for the fun part of naming the rest of the Cabinet... Who knows where everyone will end up.

Also today the Nominated Member of Parliament nominations are now open. I wonder who will be selected this time. Usually if you read the transcripts of Parliament, it's the NMP who ask a lot of questions. Which leads me to the theory that maybe NMPs should be paid more than the MP who's always sleeping in the back row. Yeah. You know who you are. Don't need to hide. It's because of you they stopped televising Parliament "live." Well that and it really is boring. So maybe that's why you're sleeping. Poor thing.

So Star Wars Episode 3 spoilers have been floating around. Some are quite interesting, but who knows which is real and which is hype. But confirm Count Douku sure die and Jar Jar doesn't. Also Palpatine/Darth Sidious will get a lot of action time and also they'll tell us the reason why Darth Vader got his name.

Ok. I'm taking off for some afternoon Z catching. I'll see all of you soon. 

Price Hikes

So the ERP at Fort Road has been raised by 50 cents to $1.50. So the Class 95 morning show crew were asking if motorists were paying for the Nicholl Highway crash which motorists had no control over. At the same time the gentry at Kallang on the PIE has been removed. So more jams on the PIE or pay like crazy on the ECP. I think it makes more sense to ride public transport to work. Now all we need to do is get rid of all those ugly Singaporeans.

Yesterday I was on my way back from work. So I was on Clementi headed towards Orchard to meet my friends for dinner. The trip to Raffles Place was alright, most of the people on the East - West line seem to be more polite or something (I ride that way home everyday). Anyway, I change at Raffles Place and I know it gets bloody crowded at City Hall, so I moved in to make way for people. But everyone else was cluster f*%king at the door. So it looks like Sardines at the door, while I had so much space I was wondering if I had BO. Anyway it gets progressively worse until Orchard, and after Somerset I wanted to go towards the exit, so I politely told this guy that I was headed for the door and if he could make way. But instead of just moving aside, he stared at me as if I was at fault for moving to the bloody door to get off at my bloody stop. Seriously, folks! Of course once the doors open at Orchard, there were these two ladies who just kept blocking me, so I had to use all the skills I picked up from American Football playing for my Fraternity team and also from Madden 2004. Felt like it too. I think after this, next season I'll be an amazing Running Back or Half Back. Even the nice Middle Eastern tourist couple knew how to get out of the way (I knew they were tourist coz' they kept checking the map, think they were trying to get to the Night Safari).

Maybe there should be an Ugly Singaporean Ban to go along with the Durian Ban and the no Food Ban. Talking about MRT, I was taking the train to Changi Airport and it occurred to me, why don't they extend it to Changi Village. My girlfriend, of course, said that no one wanted tourists to see Chao Recruits ( fresh NS boys who don't have to serve extra 6 months unlike me, bloody chao aquas) and Chao Aquas ( Cross-dressers and Transsexuals). But I thought it would be every recruits dream to have an MRT station at the Fast Craft Dock. Luckily during my Army days I live down the road, so I just take Bus Number 2 home.

Anyway Singapore Airport like a huge Mall. Think next time when my pals come to visit must show them Changi Airport first. I mean there's even a $10 haircut place near the T2 Skytrain. Even the Cold Storage downstairs of T2 stocks rice. I mean more than one brand of rice, so I'm guessing people travel all the way to the airport to buy rice. "Come to Singapore, stay at our Airport, that's all you need to see anyway." Uniquely Singaporean.

News Flash

Fahrenheit 9/11 will be coming to Singapore on the 5th of August.

News News News... or lack thereof

Ok. So this morning on the radio, 93.8 FM, they were talking about Minister Teo saying we should send more scholars to non-English nations. Of course the main push was to China, since that was in line with gah'men policy. But maybe we should consider other countries like, Russia (a lot of Chinese leaders from the second and first generation came from Russian schools) and France (ditto), Japan also (ditto). How about the Germans? Or maybe Egypt? Lebanon? South Africa? Argentina? Brazil? India?

Then someone mentioned Law, and how maybe go another non-English country to study it. It seems people don't understand that we can't go elsewhere. Most of Western Europe uses Napoleonic Laws, the US has evolved away from English Common Law, South America uses Spanish style Law, China has no law and the former Soviet nations also have no laws are use the Western European model. So how to study law elsewhere but within the Commonwealth? 

So Singapore also broke another world record. I mean we suck at sports, but all those weird activities... We come out tops. If there was such a thing as couch potato Olympics, we'd win. A 72 hour movie marathon? We're proud that we have myopic, fat, popcorn eating, coke guzzling citizens? Seriously, this isn't something we should be proud about. Of course it was reported in the Washington Post, The Star and Straits Times. I told you it was a slow weekend.

On other Singaporean news, there isn't any. Another slow news weekend. Now you know why I hate Mondays. It seems out reporters also on holiday. And they keep raising the newspaper costs.

Talking about raising fees, the pundits were right. It's fee hike season. Grab your fee hikes and go shoot some wide eyed unsuspecting Singaporean. Improved economy my big fat a@#. Maybe for the top tier, but no trickle down has reached the bottom yet and already everyone is hiking their fees. Seriously, no wonder our fellow Singaporeans are taking a hike to other countries. Can you say "BRAIN DRAIN?"

So Bush lead Kerry in the polls right now. 217 to 193 electoral seats I think. Really narrow race. 270 is needed to be elected President. So I guess it might come down to Congress and Senate to pick the new President. That'll be a first in a long time. Anyway the Democratic convention is going on in Boston right now. Sort of a formality I suppose, since John Kerry has been the "chosen one" since early this year.

Talking about "chosen ones" Star Wars Episode III has a title: Revenge of the Sith. Judging form the cartoon Star Wars: The Clone Wars, this movie will actually redeem the lousy Episode II. And also that would mean 12 odd hour marathons to finish all 6 episodes. That would top the 10 hours of Lord of the Rings.

Well this is all I have for a Monday. Check all of you out soon.

Food for thought

Ok. So the world continues to spiral out of control. Taiwan and China look like they're about to go ape s%#t over each other and Singapore got dragged into the muck. Parti Islam Se-Malaysia's chief is in the hospital with a heart attack (I would get one too, if my party lost so badly). And the US Presidential Election gets tighter and closer everyday (I'm a Republican at heart, but with John Edwards on board, I'm leaning toward Kerry).

But of course, in Today, the big news is Milo is going to be drunk at the Sports School. Like as if school kids have never known Milo is a good drink. If only they had it in the US. I always remember after running cross-country got Milo to drink. Ice Cold Milo. That was the best incentive during Army days as well. Syrup drinks were good, but Ice Milo, fwah, that one can "chiong san chiong hai." I think Sports School shouldn't have wasted money hiring nutritionists to check it out, just watch the Milo commercials lah. People spend so much money to let you know, it's great for soccer and swimming. Maybe that's why Sport School's swim team no good, they didn't drink Milo, unlike ACS and RI.

I guess Today really has inane things to report. Like what Explorer Khoo is going to do next. Seriously, I didn't think the ferry service from Singapore to Batam was that bad. Must be trying to get out of work. "Eh, Khoo where you going?" "Training for my swim. So I take paid leave, and if I run out, you just give me more lah. "How can?" "Eh! Who put the Singapore flag on Everest, you or me?" Please Mr Khoo, go back to work and help contribute to our GDP and GNI. What are you going to do next? Swim the entire Pacific to California?

So now we have a new security coordination agency. But NSCS sounds weird. Sounds like enhanced NS. Anyway, I think it's a lousy name and more red tape for all the departments that fall under its purview. So now have to report both to boss and the NSCS boss. Then take leave ask which boss? Maybe can skive, by telling one boss you'll be at the other boss' place. Then go drink coffee and eat roti prata. Same time while eating can keep a close watch on any suspicious cars parked along Jalan Kayu (how about all of them, since their all illegally parked). Also can't be too sure if there aren't any terrorist eating prata too. I suggest they also stake out arcades. Must be careful of all those kids playing sniper type games and also those flying simulators. Think they training for terrorist attacks. Also must watch those people playing the truck simulator, later they drive truck into building. We must be vigilant. We should also go to schools and check out the chemistry students, later they learn to make bombs. Watch which kid has an evil gleam in the eye when they see the Sodium/Water combo. I think instead of sending the parking aunties and uncles to fine illegally parked cars, we should have the police tow it away and arrest the driver as a terrorist under the ISA. After a while in Whitley detention centre, you'll notice illegal parking will be reduced by 80% (I pulled that number out of my a@#). For that matter arrest anyone sitting at a void deck and charge them as terrorists. Soon no more teenagers making out in the void deck. Heh. Vigilance is important. Imagine:

"Hello. Police?"
"Yes, this is Coporal Tan. How can I help you?"
"There's this van parked downstairs my block. Been parked there for 10 minutes already."
"Ok ma'am. I'll send someone to check."
--- 5 minutes later ---
"Ma'am. It's just the mail van."
"No. I tell you suspicious. The guy is slotting stuff in mailboxes. Like terrorist. Maybe mail bomb."
Line goes dead on Police side...

Anyway, it's good to be vigilant, but let's not get out of hand. Just because a person of Arab or Malay descent is going to the airplane bathroom often doesn't mean he's a terrorist. He could just have stomach ache. So relax and stop buzzing the air hostess.

Alright time to skeedadle.

Moore updates

Ok. So the BBC reported on what the Austrlians had to say about Mr Michael "I'm too good for all of you" Moore. I think the Australians hated it and the Aussie government slammed Mr Moore for being the a*#hole that he is (in case you haven't figured it out, I hate the guy). But besides slamming Mr Moore, I'd like to point out what the Aussie minister said:

"Mr Costello, who holds the second highest position in the Australian government, criticised Moore, but said the film-maker was entitled to express his views.
'Mike Moore is entitled to his opinion but that's the quintessential ugly American, sitting down attacking the Australian prime minister,' said Mr Costello. "

Yup. Freedom of speech folks. Having lived in the US, I kinda like it. Say what you want but you gotta deal with the consequences of your words and actions. Something I think that is lacking in Singapore, thanks to self-censorship and the higher power's implicit encouragment of self-censorship.

Just a short one for now. Will be back soon.

Office Politics

Hello. If you've read the Jakarta Post and the Straits Times today, you'll notice subtle differences in the reporting over the Straits of Malacca deal, while nothing is reported in Malaysia. Always interesting if you ask me.

Also the Straits Times today has a lot of news on DPM Lee's visit to Taiwan. Must be little else to report so dig up old news from Xinhua and People's Daily. I remember once I read something in the Economist and five weeks later it appeared in the Straits Times. There's no news like old news. Sometimes I think the Straits Times is like the guy in the group/office who thinks he has hot gossip, but really its like so old that everyone forgot about it.

Just read Today and found this interesting article. The problem is PM Kozumi is not the man for China-Japan normalisation. Strongest supporters for a Pan-East Asia organisation are China and Malaysia. Indonesia remains largely apprehensive and Japan needs to get out of its funk. India remains an interested outsider and has constantly "battled" China over influence in Southeast Asia. I don't think an EU-like organisation in Asia will spring up. We should innovate and come up with our own organisation to deal with our regional issues. As much as I hate to use civilisational analysis (thanks to Professor Huntington), I'd like to point out that Europe is basically Western and Byzantine cultures, while Asia is a hodge-podge of various civilisational "blocs" (try Islamic, Indian, Japanese, Chinese, Korean, Southeast Asian). Whatever model we adopt it won't be EU-ish. Indonesia, China and India combined make up more people than the EU. How can an East Asian organisation have an equal voice for both China and Brunei (pop: less than a million). Whatever arrangement we come up with we'll need to work it out on our own.

Moving on to latest office talk. So betting on the date of handover is over and new pools are being formed on the cabinet. Who will be DPM? 2 SMs (SMS..heh)? Finance Minister? Defense Minister? Foreign Minister? Why is Lim Swee Say going back to NTUC? Such a waste. I know Vivian Balakrishnan will not be Foreign Minister. Can you imagine the mistake so many protocol departments will make thinking he's a her? Wonder who education Minister will be? Reinstitute coporal punishment and make everyone do NCC? Who'll retire? Who'll be promoted? Sounding more and more like betting on World Cup or Euro or Copa (for the hard core betters out there).

I smell breakfast folks, so I got to go. Hang in there coz' I'll be back with more to say soon.

Slow News Weekend

Yeah. Slow news weekend folks. Nothing in the dozens of newspapers I've read. I wonder if like all media outlets talk to each other... "Allo'. Le Monde here" "Hey Mondey. This is BBC, anything new?" "Nope." "Harlow? Straits Times here, any 5 week old article for me to publish?" "Nope." "Sorry."
 
Anyway... The biggest news in Singapore is ole' PM Goh becoming ex-PM Goh. We'll miss you Mr. Goh. People's touch indeed. It was a nice 14 year break. Well back to a different style of leadership. I think all you punters had better buy 1208 or 0812 or 0804 or 0408 soon. I swear over the next few weeks, those numbers will be SOLD OUT. Just like the last time. Straits Times today was saying how all foreign newspapers kept saying how LHL was LKY's son and all that, but ignored that LHL has been in cabinet so long. ST also say how other world leaders come in fresh, inexperienced, unlike LHL. Erm... Well other countries' got such thing called electoral choice. Like Mr. Tony Blair. He also fresh and new some time ago. Before that Conservative Party rule for 30 odd years. But Mr. Blair didn't really screw up too bad. But even here in Singapore, everything also new what, why we need old musty guy, who been in the cabinet for so long. My clothes keep in cabinet so long also moth-eaten.
 
Moving on (don't want the Imperial sovereign Protectors to get me)... So other day Singapore Sports School in news. Their 'C' girls won swimming. What about 'B' girls? And the boys? I thought supposed to be premier school. How come ACS and RI can trounce them? Not possible mah. So much emphasis on sports. I mean ACS and RI boys not as specialised. Soccer leh? Sailing? No wins... Don't get me started on Latvia and Sweden again.
 
No more bashing on Sports. Let's move to NKF. How come their show only catered to Chinese audience? Why not have an English charity show. Like that can appeal to Chinese, Malay, Tamil, Hindi, Ang Mo, Others audience also. More money.
 
Talking about Chinese, how come TV Mobile so much Chinese programs? I mean I'm Chinese and I understand, but seriously, why cannot be nicer and make it all English? Sure, people argue old Chinese folks cannot understand English. But should we not try to be fair. Old Malay and old Indian folk also may not understand English. But young Chinese, Malay and Indian folk all understand English to some competent level. So how? How about we make it like this lah, 50% English programs, 20% Chinese programs, 20% Malay programs, 10% Indian programs. Then like that I also can learn Malay and Tamil. No seriously, I like watching old Malay movies, P Ramlee and the rest. Also Hindi movies, good watch. Especially Lagaan. That was some good stuff (might be because I'm a cricketer). More fair lor. Also help each other understand the other communities' problems and worries (are drama serials not a reflection of a communities problems, ableitly exaggerated).
 
Back to raising money, so I noticed that flag days are a very Singaporean thing, which made me think that it could be from the old days when the Chinese nationalist tried to raise money for rebellion by selling flags. Then you put flag outside your shop and house, and people know you are a good Chinese. Pro-China, Anti-Manchu. If you don't have people will shun you. Today, the tradition slightly evolved. Now you put on a sticker so you won't get hassled like as if you were in Bali tourist district. "Want to buy? Very cheap and good." My friend said a bit like protection money. Heh... I would say something, but later NKF sue me (this defamation suits thing is really taking off here in Singapore).
 
Also the other day, SMRT say they're interested in going regional. Good idea, like that Chinese and Indonesian commuters can also experience frequent LRT breakdowns, train stations that are not open (I know the NE line is not under SMRT, but still), random bag checks, and EZlink cards that can also be used to buy McDonald's, but must pay $5 non-refundable deposit (how is an unrefundable deposit a deposit).
 
Also read that now got Singapore-style Malls in Indonesia. So now I can go to Jakarta and eat BreadTalk. And buy M)phosis bags. Maybe the service will be better, plus no GST. Sounds like a plan, maybe  even the lines will be shorter. I wonder if the Great Singapore Sale, will become the Great Singapore-Style Mall Sale in Indonesia. Maybe we can import listless youths, coffee sipping teens, students studying in cafes, tai tais and a few bengs to make it more authentic. Also must have the rude sales girls, pushy/aggressive shoppers.
 
Ok I got to go now. Catch all of you soon. 

Upsized Fahrenheits

Ok. Ok. So suddenly there's a whole slate of documentaries that supposedly tell the truth about something or other.

First we have Fahrenheit 9/11 a show by Michael Moore. Mr Moore is a liberal bully boy. His Bowling for Columbine, was just irritating. Seriously, like there isn't enough liberal media out there. The Czech president came out saying it reminded him of old Communist propaganda. It's very important to know where the truth lies. Mr Moore is spreading his version of the story, just as President Bush is telling his own side of it. The truth usually lies somewhere between the two extremes. Be warned that Michael Moore is the left-wing equivalent of a fascist. It's surprising we don't really have a mean name for them. I mean "tree hugging hippie" just doesn't cut it as much as " Gun-touting fascist." Talk about language bias.

Then we have Supersize Me. A show that tells us exactly what we already know. I means seriously I always thought eating McDonald's will help me slim down. Like Jared from Subway. Who doesn't know fast food is bad for health. I swear that Burger King set this up, so McDonald's would have a public relations nightmare. But seriously, who eats 3 meals of McDonald's in a day for a whole month? I mean you got to get in your Burger King lunch and KFC dinner. What about MOS Burger?

Just eat Subway, they've been sprouting up all over. I mean Jared lost a lot of weight after a pure Subway Diet. Of course the small print says he did it with help from dieticians and fitness coaches. So really folks, just exercise. Forgot all the silly diets, eat healthy and exercise. Maybe one McDonald's a week. But 2 hours of exercise each day and eat healthy meals. You know, fruits and vegetables with some lean meat. Avoid the oily and fried. Simple stuff people. And can be found in Singapore. Drink water instead of Coke.

Maybe someone should do a "Fizz me up" movie. See what happens if you only drank Coke for a month. Actually I know people who only drink caffeinated drinks. I had a friend bounce off car walls one night. Easy on the caffeine folks.

Talking about Fahrenheit, has anyone read the book or watched the movie Fahrenheit 451. It's really a good book, highly ironic. Go read...

Ok, so King Arthur opens in Singapore. A lot of fanfare and reviews, but everyone seems to avoid To Kill a King. Seriously, I don't want to know more about King Arthur and his knights, who couldn't F@#%ing agree with one another, so the king has to build a round table to ensure all his petty knights are happy. Seriously, just go hire some Commando from Singapore. They specialise in cheating at IPPT and killing people during training. So what you do is hire them and send them to the enemy to work. The enemy's army will then be unfit and mostly dead. Hmmm... Maybe Singapore is already doing that.

I really want to watch To Kill a King, it's much better. But maybe our Clown... I mean, Crown Prince (you all know who it is) is worried about the implications. Afraid we all get ideas on how to kill a king and install a republic. Talking about the man, so Taiwan says he's there to mediate between China and Taiwan, but China says they don't need anyone to talk on their behalf. I thought he was on a private trip. Private trip also do work? No wonder they pay him $1 million a year.

Ok I got to go. Before the Imperial Sovereign Protectors (also known as ISD in Singapore), come and hang me from a noose or make me sit on an ice cube. So maybe the next time I post, I'll be in the Bahamas hiding out.

China and Singapore

Ok. So now we have a little diplomatic tussle with China. All thanks to our Once and Future King, DPM Lee Hsien Long. Yeah. He's off visiting friends in Taiwan, despite the protestations of the Chinese. So what exactly does that mean?

Well MAS had organised a talk with the speaker being the head banker of the People's Bank of China, but he cancelled his trip. Hmmm... I wonder why China's top central banker suddenly could not come to Singapore...

You know, if you really have to see friends you haven't seen in twelve years, you could ask them to meet you half way. Surely it's a small inconvenience compared to pissing off your big trade partner. Taiwan is important to Singapore but China is even more important. What will happen to all our biculturalist we are training? No relations with China, no job lor.

Actually why don't we train biculturalists to deal with Malaysia too. Malaysia is an important neighbour too. We should train more Malaysia specialists, and US specialists too. Also a few Latin American and Arab specialists wouldn't hurt. A Russian specialist would not hurt too, comrade. That way we keep our options open. Don't forget the EU specialists, now that's a life time of studying, even if they don't expand.

Talking about Europe, so this weekend they were comparing Singapore to Latvia, and asking why we can't succeed like them, or Norway or Sweden. Well, we don't start young. That's the answer. So true... Need to get them at 7 and 8, but every parent wants to produce a Beethoven and not a Beckham. Who cares if Beethoven had to find patrons, while Beckham is a relatively rich man. Yes, yes. I know what a pleb I am. No appreciation for the fine arts. Which leads me to the next question. How come all our pianinsts start young, but we only have like 2 or 3 famous ones, who are mostly girls, and usually have been abroad for a long time. Coz' most kids HATE their piano lessons. I was blessed with parents who allowed me to read instead to learning some silly instrument.

Now don't get me wrong. If you enjoy playing an instrument, that's good. But if you don't, I can only imagine the hell you live in.

So basically, once we get to a certain age, our parents start telling us to concentrate on a job and career. Once it was engineering, then computer sciences & IT, then business, then Biomedical, then who knows what else. I tell you be like the McDonald's head right now, he started flipping burgers at 14 in Australia. Now the number two is form France, also started like that.

Back to China. Sigh... Now we got major damage control to do with our big neighbour. You think someone with so much intelligence coupled with so much more intelligence behind him would figure out that someone of his capacity visiting Taiwan on holiday could still cause unhappiness in China. "But my dad go no problem leh." "Yes, but you're not your dad. You've pointed that out yourself. Dimwit."

Ok, gotta go. See all of you soon.

Elections

So Indonesia has had a presidential election. In fact, its Indonesia's first ever direct presidential election since 1955. Good for the Indonesian people. Some of my Indonesian friends went to the Indonesian embassy to vote for various candidates. That's a good sign. Also Mexico has gone to the vote and many overseas Mexicans have gone to local embassies and consulates to let their will be known. Of course, Mexico just managed to break the PRI's grip on politics in the 1990s. Actually, so did Indonesia.

Indonesia's front runner, Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono... Now that's a cool name. Everyone in the media is calling him SBY. I mean seriously, that's like such a cool name. It also helps that Mr Susilo is charismatic and also quite capable. Go Army! Ms Megawati is running in second place with Ex-General Wiranto in third. Seriously, throughout the entire campaign Ex-General Wiranto seems to have no last name. My friend suggested Ex is his first name, General is his middle name and Wiranto is really his last name. Elections were very smooth and so far there has only been on case of fraud, where Army trucks delivered voters to a certain polling station and they all voted for Wiranto. And all these people weren't even from the area. One incident in such a huge country where free and fair elections are a new thing after 50 years... Very good indeed! Indonesia has come a long way in terms of democracy.

Which leads me to Singapore. My home... Well I can't vote... Not that I legally can't, its just that my district always gets a walkover. Who wants to fight with the party of White? I also can't vote in the presidential elections coz' no one wants to run for it. Last time round they had to beg people to be president. "Tolong leh. If you don't be we got to ask the Uncle who sleeps by the road side to be leh. Help lah." And even if there was another candidate running against the 115th choice for President, I still can't vote. That's because I'm overseas, and since I'm overseas, my rights as a citizen is forfeit. So why the hell do I still pay taxes to the government? Why is my income counted in the GNI (Gross National Income)? Hey no vote, no pay! Taxation without representation (where have we heard that before)!

Sure "some" Singaporeans can vote overseas. You know... The Government Sychophants, erm, I mean Scholars and the Un-Civil, I mean Civil, Servants. They can vote because they are responsible Singaporeans. Unlike me, you know the guy that goes overseas to study and then come home to work. I not responsible. How to be? Everyday study only. Come home look after parents. Irresponsible lah. I tell you, that's why I join Civil Service also no promotion. I not government scholar, not responsible enough. Cannot trust me to do a good job mah. Because last time ah, JC never study, O level also not so many A1s. Everyday only sort school archives and build solar powered cars. Only know how to help out at church and teach Sunday school. Only can go to Sisters of Mercy and clean the place. No responsibility whatsoever.

Seeing how irresponsible I am, I decided that I should go work for some other nation. I figure I go there and destroy them lah. Help Singapore become number 1 in something. That reminds me of another rant, but I'll save that for another time.

Some Cash with your Groceries, sir?

Ok. So I decided to try the whole NTUC cash back scheme. But the nice lady at the counter told me I could only draw in multiples of 50, so no $20 for me. Furthermore they charged $0.30 to use the system. What the hell?! Having tested out the system in the US, I know that I can draw any multiple of $10 I want from the cashier and there is no charge. Here's what I think... In a year NTUC will release a statement saying that they're scraping the system because Singaporeans do not want to use the system. Look... It's not that we don't want to use it, but YOU ALL ARE F#@KING RETARDS! Seriously, maybe you should study more models and realise that you can do it like everybody else.

Which brings me to our umbrella union, NTUC. Jeez... What union in the world owns cabs, grocery stores, pharmacies and sells insurance, but does little workers' action and protection? That's right folks, NTUC! Maybe they should build a NTUC building somewhere to house all of that. We can combine synergies. So this sick fella gets into a NTUC Comfort cab all coughing and whizzing. The cab driver will tell him how NTUC has cheap medicine and take him there, whether the sick guy wants it at all. So Sick Guy goes to NTUC pharmacy to get some panadol and cough syrup. Now the pharmacist tells him that he should get some insurance and directs him to the NTUC Income counter right next door. There the Sick Guy can buy medical insurance, health insurance, life insurance, just in case. You never know what. Then off Sick Guy goes to NTUC Fairprice to get groceries and maybe some stuff to make like bu soup. And with all those plastic bags and free gifts (from NTUC Income), Sick Guy can get back into NTUC Comfort cab to send him home. Imagine that... They could call it "NTUC Wonderland." Even better still they could sell him 4day/3night package to one of NTUC's Chalets. "Sick ah? Maybe you need holiday lah, why don't you book a holiday at our Chalets."

I think NTUC should go into budget airlines too. Like NTUC Air... "We serve you only the best from NTUC Fairprice, and we will send you to the airport by NTUC Comfort. Plus 10% off Travel insurance from NTUC Income." Synergies man! Synergies...

Grumble Grumble

So I was listening to the online stream of Class 95 with Vernetta Lopez while I was working on some papers, and they were giving away tickets to some performance at Aphrodisiac. Now the entry age for men was 25 and ladies was 21, but the singer performing on that night was under 25. So does that mean he can't go in? If he can enter, how come I, age 24, can't go in? Isn't this unfair?

I remember a time when I was like 16 and we always knew that at 18, we could finally drink and go to clubs. You know all the stories your older cousins and more sneakier friends 9with fake IDs) tell you about. Of course once you reach 18, you learn that all clubs have raised the age for guys to 21. So now you can hold a bloody rifle and "die for your country," but God forbid you get to go into a club and drink and meet girls. Now of course for girls its 18. So all your JC classmates are off clubbing, while all the guys sit outside and drink Tiger (Yes there was a lot of Tiger Time).

Then you turn 21, but guess what they raise the age to 23 at all the hip clubs. So I'm stuck enjoying more time with Tiger. Of course I get to chabot to the USA and enjoy the varied nightlife. Sure the age of drinking is 21, but at least it is uniform all over. Lousy Singaporean club operators. Of course they complain that no business. Maybe if you LOWERED the BLOODY MINIMUM AGE, you'd get more business you a$@holes! Well so now I'm over the 23 mark, and yet more clubs have raised it to 25. What the F*@K?! Is there some sort of conspiracy agianst everyone born after 1980?

I swear when I turn 25, they'll raise the minimum age to 28 or something and when I'm 60 years old, the minimum age will be like 100 or something. Jeez...

Well back to the grind and keep on thinking of the US where at least I know I can enter any club at the age of 21.

John Edwards - He's so pretty

Yup! It's a fact now. John Edwards is to be John Kerry's running mate. Boston Brahmin meets Southern Boy. This kinds links to the fact that a pretty boy image is good with the women voters. Just like Amphibian, or was it Vivian, Balakrishnan. Some of my female friends were telling me about him and how cute/hot he is. I guess sex appeal matters more than policy. Heh.

Talking about our beloved men in white, I think Lim Swee Say is the PAP's Ah Beng. No seriously, he has a people's touch. And I'm not saying that coz' he also comes form Catholic High (Gong Jiao). He's bilingual and, a new term I've heard, bicultural. That's right folks, he can either send the lawyers after you or send some friends from the chap sar thiam triad after you. Not bad for a men in white (most of them are such westernised folks). I personally think he'd make a good Prime Minister for Singapore, but, well, Mr. Lee Hsien Long, also from Catholic High, has been named the next head honcho. Lim Swee Say for DPM, anyone?

Talking about politics, I was grumbling over the 6 month reduction in NS, and some friends and I came up with a new party... The 6 months Party (6MP). The first line of our manifesto would read: " Reduce the reservist liability by 6 High Cycles or 6 Low Cycles and 3 High Cycles." Either way we look at it, it's 6 months. 6 months is a lot of time in my life! So we figured if I'm back for good the next time a General Election is called, we'll constitute the party and run for elections. The only problem is we have few minority candidates. Amongst our friends we have a Jew and an Arab. We thought maybe if we put the two of them together and ran on a "peace process" campaign along with the huan wo liu ge yue campaign, we'd grab most of the votes. Where should our first area be? I was thinking Changi, coz' it's nice and quiet, plus got a few Army bases there, good for campaigning. Probably work the Northeast Areas and Bedok/Tampines as well. So vote for the 6 months party, our party symbol on the ballots will be a 6. Easy recognise one. 6 months off reservist with each vote. Stocks are limited. First come First serve! First 100 voters get an aircon suit as well.

A big HELLO!

Well, here's my first blog. I wasn't a big fan of blogging because it was originally linked to kids who didn't have much else to do but tell everyone of their public life.

But then more people began using it for productive purposes, and today blogging has become a means to broadcast your thoughts to the world. The Chinese have a tradition of doing this called Bi Ji. So moving ahead into the new century, I figured I could use the modern bi ji to help share my views.

So why? Well this motivation to make my message heard is because of an afternoon tea I had with a group of older "young Singaporeans." And I explained my "spark" theory to them. Too often we complain how dissatisfied we are we life here in Singapore, but no one does much.

Some of us argue that by joining the PAP we can change the way things are. But I argue that once you move into the power structure you lose the motivation to "rock the boat." Why? Well firstly you see things from the government points of view, and when pragmatism meets idealism, as old Frank Sinatra put it, something's gotta give. Also you become part of the structure that wants to maintain the status quo, too often we've seen young promising Singaporeans with many reformist ideas who join the ruling party and then end up toning down a lot.

How about the Opposition parties? Same reason as the PAP. Most political parties try to emulate the PAP by trying to recruit "scholars and professionals." So how different can they be from the party in White? Furthermore you cannot change things once you become the government. There is an overriding concern to maintain the status quo again.

So the top-down approach does not seem to me to be the right answer. So how about the bottom-up attack plan? Well that's a good plan of attack, in my opinion. I take inspiration from Gandhi and also from grassroots movement in the United States. Reform happens at the bottom! Before Gandhi returned to India, the Congress Party was happy to eat off the scraps of the British Raj. But once the Great Man came back, he excited the masses by doing simple things like spinning his won clothes, making his own salt and most importantly by leaving politics to Nehru and Jinnah. Martin Luther King Jr, also learnt from Gandhi and went down the same road.

Today in the US there are huge grassroots movements. The anti-war movement was sparked by the protests organised by disparate local organisations, but that became a national voice and forced politicians to take side. I've participated in Voter Registration drives with my friends. I've also hung out with the some folks from the Reelect Bush campaign, and it's very much a grassroots sort of thing. Peaceful change happens at the bottom, not the top.

So what are my thoughts on how I can reform my beloved home? By trying to teach others that we, as sons and daughters of Singapore, have a right and duty as citizens. All to often the government and ruling party stresses on our duties but ignore out rights. On the other hand, too many critics stress our rights but ignore our duties. We must be responsible citizens who are treated as such. Singapore has democratic institutions, the rule of law and, hopefully, a growing civil society. We must educate the ill- and mis- informed sons and daughters of Singapore on their role and rights as citizens.

Everyday you hear griping from everyday Singaporeans, but you see little action. What's the point? The government is monolithic and will shut people down the minute they act. True, but the British Raj was more undemocratic and more monolithic, yet a "naked fakir" could bring it to its knees. I can't do it, I have much to lose. Tell that to Ms Aung San Suu Kyi sitting in her house in Myanmar or to Mahatma Gandhi when he was in jail or MLK while he was jailed.

If you want change, go out and make change! Sick and tired of not being able to vote? Put yourself up as a candidate, or talk to other politicians and see if they represent your views. Encourage other people who care about this tiny island to stand up and be counted. Ensure true sons and daughters of Singapore are elected to represent the voice of the people. We gripe about many things, but act little on them. We need to start acting...

Of course many people tell me that I can't make a difference on my own, but I hope to "spark" one or two other people, that's all. Peaceful revolution comes over many years. The Chinese Anarchists understood this and knew also the only way to achieve their world is through education. So here I am advocating that we need to educate the ourselves to our right and duties as Singaporean men and women. We can't change the world in a day, but we sure can plant an oak seed.

Hopefully I've planted a seed in someone throughout my years of talking and explaining myself. This blog is one attempt to "spark" some of the Singaporean netizens out there. If you've been "sparked," help me out by letting others know. If you disagree or have comments, feel free to put it down.

Vox Leo